2017-11-05 2:50 am
[Going to bed finally. Watched three movies and drank 5/6 of a bottle of wine. Never drank that much wine before in one night.]
Lime green ice cream to Danny and Rose. [Was not consciously aware before going to sleep that it's Danny's birthday, although I've known for years when his birthday is, because I know five other people who have the same birthday including a best friend from high school, a young woman who was murdered, and a young man who committed suicide.]
[To bed. Wake-Up-Slow/Get-Up-Fast. Just-Get-Up. Walk to the Library. Find Bob Neal's engine. The Moment is the Miruvor is the Vehicle. One small glass of wine. Two days of shopping, lack of sleep, hangover staved off only by twice taking a headache tablet containing caffeine: exhausted. Halfway in the Projection Room all day, will close eyes and start flipping channels. My mind is like a remote control right now.]
[Had to get up to say I was] thinking about the role the Dream Usher has in pumping energy uphill from the 2-3-4 to the Uppers, when I unexpectedly saw the vague image of an impish character pushing up around the air in front of his chest with both hands and clearly heard these exact words, "I'm ready to do this! I'm good at it!" [I was not asleep.]
[Back to bed.]
2017-11-06 4:00 am
My higher self Stephen is in charge of a martial arts activity on a large white mat which is really the Nowhere. I am given a neatly folded package of light brown fibrous netting. Cwahacoy appears wearing this as a martial arts uniform and I can't help noticing since she's standing right in front of me that her perfect breasts are completely visible through the shirt. SC stands next to her on her LEFT, also female. Cwahacoy looks like Lori C.
My Soul Retinue and I are employees of the Pizza Place and we're advancing upon the place en masse because we plan to hang out there on our day off, not to work. The leader Stephen/SC tells everybody to stay together so we won't be mistaken for shift workers so we all draw close, i.e. we merge.
An employee hasn't shown up for work and repeated suggestions are made for me to work his shift. I decide this might be fun, that is, I merge with the Dream Usher who thus shows up to work. He's a serious little white guy with dark curly hair in an afro.
I am reminded to get MY MAIL which has been building up. Doubleness indicates I experienced more than one version of some of the following events.
My mail is on a table. There's a big envelope with BLUEPRINTS in it, and a highly desirable and interesting antique wooden ship carved out of a solid piece of wood and painted dark red. SC explains that the dark-colored ring of HOLES you see on old pictures of wooden ships are not holes but FLOATS and he says this boat NEEDS MORE FLOATS. There are also two tall plywood objects like smokestack cut-outs, but four feet high, while the boat is only 1-1/2 foot long and one foot high. The 1/4" plywood cut-outs are in terrible condition and I QUESTION the use of plywood to make an accessory to an antique or ancient carving. There's a MESH or NETTING layered on top of the boat's exterior surface as if painted on. I'm aware that the boat is a gift from an admirer, possibly a sponsor. I am happy to receive it, and glad someone appreciates my work. The boat is really my 6ness dream body Cwahacoy.
As this experience and the ensuing experiences continue, more and more support and appreciation keep coming in, because I merged with Cwahacoy earlier when I looked at her naked body in the MESH outfit. At one point Mouse is there, a tall, serious woman with short blonde hair, and I'm explaining something to her. A BOOK is presented to me which is autographed by the author, Donald something, who is actually my higher self starting to come together. He WRITED SCRIPTURE under his signature on the flyleaf.
I am running to my CAR which is parked along the Nowhere, a GRASSY AREA in Nevada City where the river should be, but instead it's a WILD GREEN area, running UPHILL. I expect to find a bright YELLOW parking ticket on the sky BLUE VEHICLE.
I'm at Whirly's house, a.k.a. Donald, and there are several young men there who have projects that Donald is sponsoring.
I go back to get my car again, but it's not there. I wake up in the Dayly Dreame in the Vibes while more scenes form, but in my bed I forget to merge with the scenes.
[Back to bed.]
Daytime, approaching a building which has a short, wide staircase in front. The building is brown or slightly reddish gray-brown stone. I decide to run up the stairs three at a time and once I'm inside the open air building, which has pillars and posts instead of walls and doors, I decide to fly. This gives me the idea to jokingly check whether or not I'm dreaming, although of course I can tell I am not, because this experience is totally real, beyond question, but for the fun of it while flying around and periodically pumping myself back into the air with appendages at my sides which resemble short arms that end at the elbows. I go ahead and try to push my finger through my palm. Of course the HAND is completely solid and my equally solid finger won't go through it, but I fly around some more anyway, enjoying the ability to land on the stone floor and then pump myself back into the air with those appendages.
Having tried hard to focus on remembering everything that was given to me by my sponsor Donald, who is really my future self Whirly, I check my shirt pocket and sure enough, there's an envelope I forgot. It's a short white envelope stapled shut about three times with the end cut off. I look inside and see about three or four pieces of 500 peso bills, and a few miscellaneous bills. I feel very fortunate to have such a generous benefactor [Chained Content.]
The voice of Donald speaks to me and I am conscious of being both people: "Wow. I love you." [A third phrase is forgotten.]
[Thunderstorm. Lying down in dream bed, no sounds or headphones. No electricity still, three hours later.]
[To bed. Wake-Up-Slow/Get-Up-Fast, Just-Get-Up. Walk to Library, visit Neal. See engine work, learn its function.]
[New technique: SlamDunk = go to sleep in seconds, remaining aware. Repeat this intention every few seconds. SlamDunk.]
"I'm Going to Get Bit"
[Woke up in the Projection Room listening to Harry Belafonte sing, "That's Right, the Woman is... Smarter!"]
I arrive with three members of my Soul Retinue at a business park at night and while the ones dressed up as my father and his friend get out of the VEHICLE and go someplace, the one dressed up as T. stays with me in the car. I decide that it would be nicer for others if I were to park the car instead of sitting in the parking lot with the lights on and the motor running and I explain this to T. as I maneuver my Magical Mindset i.e. ability to deal with the Moment (the car) slowly around the small parking lot.
When the others get back I am Limberluck, which I can tell because of the DUFFEL BAG in the car where I keep my things. We all go inside and I leave my duffel in the car. It's large and GREEN.
Inside we WAKE UP in the well-lit government office building (by ident) and it's an indoor mall of odd stores (by appearance). The two big men set off walking with the one disguised as DR explaining to the one disguised as B. Delzell that he has to do a better job of WAKING UP. Bob is in his boxers and white T-shirt for sleeping and plowing along through the Tunnel with his eyes half open in a SLEEPY TRANCE.
I decide to go through the Urumara into a Miruvor Store, i.e. a place that sells energy which is disguised as tasty craft beers. Based on what I see around the large store--windowless and softly lit in a way that is relaxing and pleasant--I figure I could probably find some of the beer I used to love so much. Nitpicker and Potwatcher appear in an island counter to assist with my every need so I ask the one on my LEFT if they have any Hefeweizen. I REALIZE MY SPEECH IS SLURRED due to my false teeth, so I repeat several times till I get it enunciated right, but the young man seems bewildered, so I turn to the young man on his LEFT and ask if they have Pale Ale or India Pale Ale.
T. distracts me from this search for one good bottle of beer and draws me away down the Tunnel to show me a special animal he has trapped in a short tube of some opaque plastic material that he closed by TWISTING the ends closed.
I'm looking at an AMAZING ANIMAL on the shelf in the store. Since I'm thinking of buying it and taking it home, one of my Soul Retinue (SC) asks me if I really think that's a good idea. The animal looks like a VERY WISE MOUSE but is posing stretched out as if for a photo shoot and appears to be dressed up, leaning jauntily on a fake tree in its little environment on the shelf. I explain to SC that I am aware that this exotic animal is full of mischief, a real trouble maker, a "lying, stealing," trickster, and I imagine the kind of nightmarish trouble I'd start by taking it home.
The ANIMAL ON THE SHELF in front of me morphs into a large GREEN SNAKE and it's time to get out of here, but I am in a TRANCE AND PARALYZED. The snake gets bigger and meaner as I become more and more immobilized. It has its mouth wide open and I know it is going to strike. SC asks why I'm standing in front of a snake and I say, "I'm going to get bit," and wake up with the store muzak going through my mind in the Dayly Dream: "That's right, the woman is... Smarter!" which is in reference to Mouse. The snake represents the Dream Usher's task, to alter our accustomed settings, and I woke in the Nowhere, when it lunged at me I SLOWLY WOKE UP, but forgot to Just-Get-Up.
2017-11-07 12:10 am
[Back to bed.]
[The dream above took place after a single sleep cycle. I will now use the SlamDunk technique to go to sleep, as fast as possible while repeating every few seconds the intention to be asleep AND aware in mere seconds. Just walk to the Library and interview Bob Neal about his engine.]
[Back to bed.]
In the Tunnel with my Soul Retinue I hang back to pick up a black partial arrowhead and some chunks of JASPER. The Tunnel resembles an alleyway littered with a variety of junk. I jump to the side to let an ODD VEHICLE roll past on its inadequate little metal roller dumpster wheels. The driver is some sort of recycler. I show the jasper to one of my Soul Retinue when I catch up with them. The arrowhead turns out to be a piece of jasper with one side a perfectly flat machine cut.
Another dream forgotten.
[Back to bed. Suction of Sleep.]
[Aware of dreams but wouldn't get up, all is lost. Just remembered] Limberluck joking around about accomplishing something by FARTING. [Actually I thought I saw the word 'fart' peripherally when my eye grazed the scribble above, then remembered the snippet.]
[Just-Get-Up, Wake-Up-Slow/Get-Up-Fast. Wake Up Right. Walk to Library, interview Bob Neal. Not sleepy. J. using computer.]
Someone is not putting as many bacon bits on T.'s salad as on everyone else's, so I'm letting them know.
2017-11-08 3:00 am
"Use the Notebook as a Filter"
In a place I inhabit with members of my Soul Retinue including one I mistake for DR, who isn't there, I'm in the garage workshop trying to plug HOLES. I've created a hole for the dogs to go out which is actually the Urumara, as are several objects in this dream. It is a SURPRISE to see that DR created this hole by smashing a double layer of safety glass covering a big square HOLE in the wall at floor level. I recall a direct encounter with a dog, but vaguely. The hole leads to the Nowhere which is like a back yard. I use a small HAND-held broom to sweep greasy dirt off of a workbench in the corner by the wall in the RIGHT side in a long, narrow Tunnel formed by wood where I plan to add a shelf as a roof. There's another small HOLE I plan to block with fine bailing wire, but I run out of that and complain loudly to Mouse when it happens. The workbench was made to hold a large BOOK placed there by DR, open to a certain page--this DR is really Whirly, he's not there, but I have his ident which is serious and quiet, almost stern. The shelf or bench top is only wide enough for the book which has been open to the same page for so long that when I go to close it, it won't close well, the binding has that place memorized. I plan to string the wire past it so when I do that, I close the book so the wire won't get it dirty. I'm off to the store for wire, though I really shouldn't spend the money.
I come to a place as I WALK through an intersection where the street--which is the Tunnel--jogs so that the intersection--really the Moment of Choice--is double-wide. ID=Kansas, the Garp Waddidge area. I walk along the median strip monitoring the approach of CARS from the four directions--4ness is, among other things, the four directions--then I walk past APARTMENTS I HAVE KNOWN, which are now empty RAMSHACKLE places, almost ruins, including one I'm especially curious about where a middle-aged gay couple lived. It is also empty at least long enough for much-needed renovation. I can see through the Nowhere, which appears as the GLASS FRONT of the apartment. I see this one certain place has a big HOLE in the ceiling where it had rotted out, about 4 x 8 feet. I go through the Urumara and teleport to a place of special interest, the Tunnel which appears as a corridor where I'll be working for D. Levy. Desks will line the hallway in this drab, concrete warehouse-like, tenement office building, and I can imagine that locks will be broken off desk drawers by mischievous tenants going past. I can't imagine what I could do to prevent that. DL i.e. the Boss, my 3ness dream body, is trying to SLIM DOWN his operation, so moving to this hallway in lieu of an office is his new plan.
I end up in an old apartment I USED TO LIVE IN where DL is planning to set up his office. I see that I left an old pad of 20-inch-square paper with my notes written on it in large letters. This is the Projection Room. Personal stuff. I see that DL has taken an interest. Specific exact words are written including something about something GREEN, but what I can recall are the words "Use the noebook paper as a filter." I TWIST the old used-up art paper tablet in my hands and stuff it somwhere to be discarded.
I am aware, but slightly, of WAKING UP SLOWLY. I decide I became aware too late to Just-Get-Up, feeling too physical. I am in vibrations and I'm there a long time having to pee. Peeing is still optional but don't want to go back to sleep and so I get up to relieve myself. Surprised it's not 4:00 a.m. yet, I still have time to practice Awakening Very Slowly so I can Just-Get-Up, walk to the Library, and find Bob Neal for a long, detailed interview about his magic air engine.
[Back to bed.]
[Woke up in dream but did other stuff first and now can't remember the dream.]
2017-11-08 12:30 pm
Suction of Sleep, lying down to experience Awakenings and Just-Get-Up, Wake Up Slow and Get Up Fast. Walk to the Library and interview Neal about his engine. Will do the Buzz Breath till asleep. Combine with my new method, "SlamDunk" i.e. resetting the intention to retain awareness through the sleep transition while intending to go to sleep in seconds and resetting these intentions every few seconds. Like this: Do the Buzz Breath 30 times and hold breath, empty mind, reset, repeat. Mantra = RATS, SIS: "Retain Awareness Through the Transition to Sleep" (repeated while holding breath out), then "Sleep in Seconds" (repeated while holding breath in).
[AWK1] "All right. First day of school... tomorrow."
[AWK2] [Not asleep; while holding breath.] Kissing a beautiful sultry girl. "When you go in, I'm gonna go in with you."
[AWK3] Mouse [my 3rd eye chakra] appears as a gawky girl with short, straight, thin, tomboyishly unstyled dark hair. "Just in case you might be fapping."
[AWK4] Image of Rod Stewart. "FK, How's it goin' man, you get larger than life every single year."
[Two breath cycles ago I stopped trying to max out the lungs on the bellows breath thing and just remembered to use the proportionality factor only, taking easy but full inhales.]
[MY SECOND WILD. Stopped getting up to write Awakenings because I noticed I was in sleep paralysis or something, which I didn't test. Wearing my lucidity hat. Tears of joy like two years ago when I had my first conscious exit in 35 years, but this time I'm not framing the hanky (or should I?). I had been telling myself to push the envelope on holding the breath, while relaxing the urge to panic, because I know that the fear barrier for me is losing conscious control of breathing. Still vibey. Ecstatically happy.]
I had tried to memorize a couple Awakenings where I got hypnagogic phrases, instead of getting up to write in my journal like I did for the first four AWKs. I was in some kind of sleep paralysis, but did not test it to find out what kind. Besides getting up to write in my journal four times, I had been moving somewhat freely in the bed, even cracking my knuckles, putting my knees up a couple times, and then on a whim I lay still and BAM something came over me. Not quite BAM but it was sudden in a sense. It was a stronger case of what I've noticed during Vac-U-Move sessions occasionally when the body sense suddenly switches to a panoramic or Metsuke body sense; instead of a twinge here and a tickle there, it's one sense of one body sorta like without parts. It's really hard to describe but I knew it was important. It's a bit like having a current run through the body that turns it into one indivisible thing instead of a bunch of parts strung together. It might even be a forerunner of the Vibes and sleep paralysis since that's what happened. I didn't feel any Vibes as such, but I was in a breathing session so was vibing a lot anyway, and might not have noticed since I'm kinda used to them.
I had one breath-holding session (holding the breath in) when I caught the exact moment of going to sleep because at that moment, the act of accidentally losing hold of the breath woke me before I got to the other side of sleep. It was the same as going to sleep with a book in your hand and dropping the book, exactly the same thing.
Not long after that, I had a phantom wiggle of the whole body as well as both hands at the same time. My whole body literally turned in the horizontal plane at about ten degrees counter-clockwise, which woke me when I realized I was unworlded.
These encouraging signs cued me to stop getting out of bed to record Awakenings, so on a whim I kept still which was simple to do because I was very relaxed by then, and I felt that whole-body numbness or electrical sensation--maybe this is the Gravity Blanket-- but not really the Vibes as such. So I held still and tried to relax some more.
Then I noticed that the odd feeling increased in my feet and moved up to my waist. I recall thinking maybe this was sleep paralysis after all, but didn't want to break it by testing it. I thought maybe I'd done the right thing by holding my breath longer and longer and telling myself that the urge to breathe comes in waves like the urge to eat or the urge to pee, so there's no need to panic because there's always plenty of time for the autonomous process of breathing to take care of things on its own. When I say that the fear barrier--the fear of transitioning through the Urumara to sleep--has to do with the conscious mind's not wanting to let go of the semi-autonomous processes like breathing and swallowing, I am not guessing. This has been a constant theme during all my Daytime Practices ever since I started. Waking up wrong--in a choking panic--is what's really slowed me down, but I've seen steady progress in the past two years, slowly getting this panic under control.
That Unibody sizzling feeling traveling up my legs was the last thing I remember, so I must have lapsed into unconsciousness just long enough to go through the Urumara and next thing I know, something very energetically noticable and unusual is happening and I couldn't believe it at first, but in seconds it became obvious that I was completely conscious and fully unworlded. Unfortunately this either happened in a fog or I forgot exactly how the realization came about, but I'm not complaining because I do remember how it felt. It was the most amazing thing that ever happened to me. This was like getting lucid in a dream, times twenty. I am so envious of myself, I just wish I remembered it better.
What increased my amazement and lucidity more was that when I realized I was unworlded, I started to laugh, and I'm getting goose bumps all over my body while I type this, because the laughter that bubbled out of me felt like thick lava bubbling out the side of a volcano. The voice that came out of me surprised me because part of me had assumed, when I was not so paralyzed that I couldn't laugh, that I had returned to the physical. Not so! If you've ever heard a giant laugh, or Tim Curry as the devil, or any really over-seven-foot-tall dude, that's what the voice sounded like [see the sound file below the above illustration], and it was coming out of me! At first it scared me and I stopped, then I remembered having laughed myself lucid before and even being able to fly due to laughing.
So I let the laughter come out again and the effects were pretty incredible. I can't remember the details very well because I was so excited and this experience was almost too lucid to remember if you can believe that. I mean, this has never felt so real and visceral before. Lucid dreams are cool but this was my first unworlding since...
Wait! I just remembered what happened!
I said above that I didn't remember the onset of the state, so I thought maybe I just woke in a haze. Not quite. I still don't remember the exact moment of beginning to suspect I was in an unworlded state, but I do recall taking a hint from my last lucid dream, which had started as an OBE which had started from a dream. In which I'd told myself to Just-Get-Up and I felt myself physically get up and then went through the Urumara into a lucid dream. So I recalled that experience today when I realized I was unworlded, and immediately did what I've been programming myself to do for weeks: I told myself to Just-Get-Up. And that's when my mind got blown because I was totally paralyzed, and that's when I started laughing.
OK, so after the laughing I wondered what was gonna happen next because I was happy to be paralyzed and it didn't seem like a problem. Wait, now I remember, I found myself struggling to get out of my body and remembered my admonitions to others that getting out of a body is not the goal, so I relaxed and sure enough, my feet floated right up, just like jillions of other people have reported. Then I felt myself being pulled by the feet and remembered having felt this much more intensely in my first WILD, but I guess I focused on the feeling too much and it faded.
Then I got visuals of old-fashioned kitchen cupboards with cheap dark metal handles on them, and they had been painted more than once, the paint was that rough texture you get from painting something over and over. This was actually the Nowhere (the void a.k.a. the 3D blackness) but I failed to recognize it. I held the vision and realized that the whole experience had taken place in a setting that bore the ident of my earliest childhood home, although the only visuals were the ones I got at the last. I held the white visuals for a while and then decided to not try and go back in because I wanted to remember everything and could feel the intensity of the experience fading quickly.
There's no way to tell how long I'd lapsed into sleep before waking in the Unworld, if at all. I've already mentioned several things that happened during the 35 minutes that I stopped getting up to record each Awakening. By looking over the journal I see that the induction started after lunch at 12:30 beginning with a short lapse which ended with my first Awakening at 1:01. So it's not an exaggeration to say that I devoted over an hour-and-a-half to having this experience, not to mention the two years before that, not to mention the 35 years before that, not to mention the 10 years before that when I waited for my first unworlding. I started this phase of my practice on November 13, 2015, almost exactly two years ago.
This is my new technique then, I call it the SlamDunk method, and what worked was the original intention-setting thing, but to that I added the breathing and the actual mantra-izing of the intention, which worked great, because whenever I stopped repeating the mantra I felt the internal dialog creeping back in and was able to quickly stop it and reset the intent by repeating the intention phrases, over and over, with feeling.
THE SLAMDUNK TECHNIQUE (thus named because it's supposed to be a direct induction with a more forceful, pro-active methodology than lying still waiting for the signposts like sleep paralysis and vibrations to come to you. I didn't notice any Vibes other than the usual ones caused by breathing. I had no thought of paralysis till I noticed odd sensations and then tried to Just-Get-Up and was paralyzed. The paralysis was spontaneous.)
Lie down during the afternoon (for example) when awake and sleepy at the same time. In other words, technically well-rested but with sleep pulling at you for some reason. Keep yourself awake by breathing intensely. The Buzz Breath consists of disproportionate intake and exhaust. The intake is full, belly then chest, expand the ribcage, while the exhaust is faster and less complete. There is no reason to wear holes in the lungs or do this to the straining point. What's important is the disproportionality between a full intake and a less complete exhaust. Do it lying down, sober, healthy, comfortable--the usual disclaimer. If standing up you'll possibly hyperventilate and fall down.
I also added the Wim Hof method of holding the breath out after 30 to 50 or more connected breaths. Hold it out as long as you can without spazzing out. Then consciously relax and stop spazzing while you hold it even longer. Then take one long relaxed full breath and hold it in as long as you can. Then relax and take a few slow but uncontrolled breaths if necessary and start another cycle.
The mantra I used was RATS, SIS. During the breathing there is no need for a mantra or anything. During the holding-out of the breath I repeated in my mind, "Retain awareness through the transition to sleep," while part of the time I visualized as follows: "Retain" (clutching an eyeball in my hand and shaking it back and forth in my visualized hand); "Awareness" (holding the eyeball up between two fingers so we can see each other; "Transition etc." (pushing the eyeball into my forehead where the third eye goes); "Sleep" (seeing through my mind's eye in Metsuke fashion, i.e. seeing the whole visual field as a single panorama. No time to worry about whether anything is actually seen, just to Notice the visual field of the mind's eye which has 360 degree perspective.)
I don't think the visualization is the most important part and I wasn't doing it the whole time, but thought I'd mention it. I was wearing a black-out mask but was not using headphones like I often do. I never once noticed any noise outside since I've trained myself to ignore distractions. No one else was home and it was a quiet day with kids off at school.
During the holding-in of the breath, the mantra is "Sleep in seconds." Both the mantras have double meanings, which the Remote Mind can handle with ease, it'll just use the meaning that fits best or code up a new one to fit. "Retain through transition" means to retain awareness both "throughout" the transition and "because of" the transition. "Sleep in seconds" means both "I'll be asleep in mere seconds, so pay Attention," and "Sleep in very short lapses and then pull yourself up." Simple phrases are best. My usual mantra is just the word "dream" which the Remote Mind can interpret in many ways. RATS, SIS is the most complicated mantra I've ever used. The purpose of the mantra is to reset the intention to retain awareness and be watching for that moment of transition, resetting the intention over and over, with variations on the enunciation and with feeling.
I give the breathing and the mantra most of the credit for the success of this technique on the first try, and made no particular attempt to remain completely still until I was already very relaxed and had already had several lapses into sleep. The timing of when I decided to stay very still seemed to work out well and there was no hour or two of lying stiff-as-a-board. I got out of bed four times in about an hour-and-a-half-plus to record little dreams and hypnagogic phrases, pee, then immediately straight back to bed and breathing. For me this is more effective than lying still for a long time. For me, getting out of bed is sorta like flippin' the bird at the restricifiers who say you can't move, swallow, etc. On the other hand, I would have liked to have not lapsed out and woken up in a fog, but that's coming. That's next.
Veteran unworlders might pooh-pooh the results I got: legs floated up, so what... but everyone starts somewhere and this is by far my most lucid direct exit. All my more complete OBE exits have been either unconscious, spontaneous/accidental/unexpected, indirect (upon awaking from deeper sleep), or dream conversions. So not only is this the first time I've purposely laid down to get unworlded and got unworlded, it's also the first time I've had a conscious afternoon unworlding of any kind since 1980, so that's maybe another world opening up for me since my mornings are a push to get kids to school, but my afternoons are kinda more flexible.