APRIL 1956 to NOVEMBER 2015
"... Tonight, in your dreams, you must look at your hands."
Not much more was said about this in the awareness of our daily world. In my recollection of my experiences in the second attention, however, I found out that we had a more extensive exchange. For instance, I expressed my feelings about the absurdity of the task, and don Juan suggested that I should face it in terms of a quest that was entertaining, instead of solemn and morbid.
"Get as heavy as you want when we talk about dreaming," he said. "Explanations always call for deep thought. But when you actually dream, be as light as a feather. Dreaming has to be performed with integrity and seriousness, but in the midst of laughter and with the confidence of someone who doesn't have a worry in the world. Only under these conditions can our dreams actually be turned into dreaming."
Don Juan assured me that he had selected my hands arbitrarily as something to look for in my dreams and that looking for anything else was just as valid. The goal of the exercise was not finding a specific thing but engaging my dreaming attention. Don Juan described the dreaming attention as the control one acquires over one's dreams upon fixating the assemblage point on any new position to which it has been displaced during dreams.
In more general terms, he called the dreaming attention an incomprehensible facet of awareness that exists by itself, waiting for a moment when we would entice it, a moment when we would give it purpose; it is a veiled faculty that every one of us has in reserve but never has the opportunity to use in everyday life.
My first attempts at looking for my hands in my dreams were a fiasco. After months of unsuccessful efforts, I gave up and complained to don Juan again about the absurdity of such a task.
"There are seven gates," he said as a way of answering, "and dreamers have to open all seven of them, one at the time. You're up against the first gate that must be opened if you are to dream."
"Why didn't you tell me this before?"
"It would've been useless to tell you about the gates of dreaming before you smacked your head against the first one. Now you know that it is an obstacle and that you have to overcome it."
Don Juan explained that there are entrances and exits in the energy flow of the universe and that, in the specific case of dreaming, there are seven entrances, experienced as obstacles, which sorcerers call the seven gates of dreaming.
"The first gate is a threshold we must cross by becoming aware of a particular sensation before deep sleep," he said. "A sensation which is like a pleasant heaviness that doesn't let us open our eyes. We reach that gate the instant we become aware that we're falling asleep, suspended in darkness and heaviness."
"How do I become aware that I am falling asleep? Are there any steps to follow?"
"No. There are no steps to follow. One just intends to become aware of falling asleep."
--Carlos Castaneda, The Art of Dreaming
September 29, 2017
It's been almost two years since I began this phase of my practice, after waiting many years to make it my retirement hobby. Thanks in large part to writing down everything that's happened to me in non-physical states of awareness, I've logged over two dozen lucid unworldings, which come at the end of each of these chapters and are separately repeated by themselves in the Milestones journal. Two dozen lucid episodes including no more than three or four that could be termed 'out-of-body experiences' might not seem like much, but this doesn't come easy to me. To the extent that I wish to be fully conversant with the Unworld, it does not come natural to me.
The main purpose of this excerpted version of my dream journal is to leave out some of the verbiage in my dream journal while including enough that it will still be useful to me. Near the end of each journal chapter (either this full journal or the much shorter Milestones version), you will find unworlding experiences which can be classified as OBEs and/or lucid dreams.
Since I was still using old worn-out terminology like 'OBE,' new terminology like 'unworlding' is not used in early parts of the dream journal. At the bottom of this page I will list some abbreviations and other quirks commonly used in my dream journal.
NOMENCLATURE AND ABBREVIATIONS
[LS]: little sleep accompanied by a little dream
[NLOBE]: non-lucid OBE, similar to LS but takes place in RTZ
[AWK]: the term 'Awakening' has now replaced both 'LS' and 'NLOBE'
[Stuff in brackets is my comments, usually written the same time as the description of the dream or other experience.]
"Quotes are used only when exact words are remembered from the dream."
SC: silent companion, dream character(s) unseen and unheard, but whose presence is noticed.
SP: sleep paralysis
Cwahacoy: a dream character of varying appearance who is the essence of female companionship for me personally. Stands for 'crush-who-also-has-a-crush-on-you'.
Stumped-No-More: a dream character of varying appearance who embodies my highest self, comprised of all seven dream bodies (chakras) in balance with each others' respective focus or energy level. A.K.A. Tiger or Whirly, he appeared in the best dream I ever had, near the time (1980) when I had my first conscious OBE.
FK: Frank Kepple, OBE teacher; compilation "FranksPosts.pdf" is available on the forum astralpulse.com.
FA: Fred Aardema, OBE teacher, his book has a must-read chapter on the 3D darkness a.k.a. the Void
JZ: Jurgen Ziewe, author of Multidimensional Man and Vistas of Infinity
MR: Michael Raduga, Siberian author of The Phase which is by far the best book on pragmatic OBE technique
RAM: Robert A. Monroe, founder of TMI, whose three books formed the backbone of what was known of this art for decades
MPE: Sylvan Monroe a.k.a. 'Mike' of Phase Evolution, my favorite OBE channel on YouTube
RB: Robert Bruce, OBE teacher with books full of detailed instructions and many youtube videos and courses
CC: Carlos Castaneda, a metaphysical writer whose teaching novels go deeper into explaining experiences of expanded awareness than any book of new age philosophy.