FEBRUARY 15, 2017 to FEBRUARY 20, 2017
Conscious astral projection never will be accomplished by anyone who cannot control his emotions.
--Sylvan Muldoon, AThe Projection of the Astral Body
2017-02-15 3:20 am
[Woke up dreaming about] two different ways to get a string of number including ...6005... [No other dreams recalled.]
3:35-3:46 am
[Meditation, muggons, back to sleep, main bed, WILD induction, will stay calm, look at hands, catalyze the level of awareness using the 5+ senses, will experience Urumara, teleport by passing hands across eyes to change scene. Remember personal lucidity objects: quartz, musical instruments, maps, books, vehicles, copy machine.]
4:05 am
[Back to bed for lucid dreaming.]
5:35 am
I ask DR what it would be like if I were to work with him at his job, and he gets excited and starts telling me all about it while I putter around the room and forget to listen to him. I realize what I'm doing and say, "I'm sorry, I asked you about something and then didn't pay any attantion." I stand still with my arms crossed and listen and he starts out.
He says, "You'll have these reports lined up on the table to read..." and I see the table and the reports and I'm in his building looking for a restroom. I imagine someone challenging me about being there, imagine telling them I have a key to the place.
I'm in the restroom peeing through a tube. I WONDER why I did that and realize it's because IT'S JUST A DREAM but the impact of that realization doesn't strike me. ["I'm dreaming" is not enough. The next thought should be, "I remember who I am." Otherwise, thought #3, "This is real," will be twisted to mean, "This is real so I'm not dreaming."]
I'm outside, sunny, in a narrow twisted walkway [the Tunnel] surrounded by large square objects like chicken coops or something. I want to show some people I CAN FLY EVEN WHEN I'M NOT DREAMING, SO I FLAP MY ARMS, AND SURE ENOUGH, I'M ABLE TO LIFT UP GRADUALLY INTO THE AIR and float up, navigating among the objects all around.
5:46 am
[Back to sleep, main bed. Apple juice.]
Daytime, sunny. At home I hear Breeze's voice calling to me, so I go out on the terrace. Amazingly enough, he really has come to visit me here at my home in the Philippines. He has black plastic glasses and long black hair like in the old days. Somehow he has managed to LEVITATE or be lifted up to the level of the terrace. I cling to him.
7:50 pm
[Brownout, to bed early. WILD. Don't focus on one thing, do observe everything = Metsuke.]
9:30 pm
[New term covering images, aurages, feelages, movages, thinkages, smellages, tastages, etc. = "Noticings, anything apprehended by the 5+ senses in non-physical activity."]
10:50 pm
Living at the Commune in a forest I see someone carrying a small child to the doctor's cottage, so I run there in the rain or snow and go in all cold and breathless to see if Ker and Mika are OK. Once inside the tiny lobby [Green Room], the room is empty so I call out and the doc opens the BIG GREEN CURTAIN and I ask and he says they're OK. I'm relieved.
Back in my cabin, I decide I'll grab some cheese and stuff and go to Breeze's house and we'll hunker down and munch out in the warmth of companionship on account of the cold weather.
[Wake up in Projection Room. Remembered to stop moving and by quieting the mind was able to experience Beyond Noticing full-size images.]
[Will go back to sleep into a WILD session.]
2017-02-16 3:40 am
[No dreams recalled.]
4:00-4:10 am
[Meditation.]
4:25 am
[Dream bed, mask, WILD, apple juice. When I know I'm dreaming I will look at my hands, rub hands, clap hand, shake hands, repeat affirmation, spin to teleport to the Urumara, and experience the Urumara from all sides. Repeat affirmation. Mug-o-roma.]
***
Sitting in an old YELLOW-upholstered armchair with some unseen companions [my dream bodies] nearby, I GET THE IDEA TO PUSH MYSELF UP INTO THE AIR by holding onto the arms of the chair. I do this very SLOWLY AND DELIBERATELY. It is easy to do and my focus is just right. The effort to do this was vivid and I ended up with my BACK ARCHED AGAINST THE CEILING but could not win the argument about WHETHER I WAS DREAMING OR NOT. [Woke up vibrating and didn't get up to write it down so details lost. Was very vivid at the time.]
[Stop using alarm and start telling self to wake up during REM for a WILD induction.]
5:50 pm
[Breathwalking despite 24+ hours of rain ending mid-morning. I walked earlier and the road isn't that bad.]
7:10 pm
[Muggons.]
7:30 pm
[To bed, breathing, WILD.]
2017-02-17 9:30 am
[Good WILD session last night, but refused to write it down at the time, so don't remember much except Noticing seemed to be assisted considerably by muggons. After that I had a night of Awakenings, remembering vague, abstract, near-conscious snippets hard to decribe and didn't try to record anything. Didn't set alarm, so missed 3 a.m. meditation and instead woke up 4:30 a.m. and just went back to bed in case I'd have to get up at 5:30. But got to sleep till 7:30 and had a great dream.]
"Lucidity: the Elephant in the Room"
Someone has talked me into taking their extra elephant home. I tie it up in my front yard. Ident Trinidad but living with T. and J.. The elephant kisses my HAND with its big tongue, affectionately and WITH SENTIENCE. [Almost lucid.] My OTHER HAND brushes against something rubbery which STARTLES me and I look. It was the end of the elephant's trunk, which it uses like a HAND to touch me and try to COMMUNICATE SOMETHING. [Very close to lucid.]
In order to keep the elephant from being a nuisance, I unplug its tongue and its forelegs and take them into the house. I keep them on top of the stove.
Several days have passed and I suddenly REALIZE I'VE TOTALLY FORGOTTEN to feed the elephant since bringing it home. I feel bad about this and don't know what to feed it, so I gather some stray bits of dirty old dog food to give it.
With horror, I see that my disabling the elephant has caused it great pain. It is at the end of its rope and has fallen down in front of a 6-foot-tall CONCRETE WALL THAT ELEVATES the house and yard from the sidewalk. The rope is too short so the elephant's head is on the sidewalk while its rear legs are pushing against the top part of the wall. It's so upset and miserable that it's blowing smoke out of its mouth and nose.
I run into the house to get the parts I removed. I am able to plug the tongue back in after fishing around and getting it close. The elephant manages to get it in the rest of the way by moving its mouth around. The forelegs are harder. I can't figure out what to do. The elephant is now a man [Dream Usher: thin, gaunt, wavy hair, blue jeans, red flannel plaid shirt] and an elephant at the same time. He shows me how to replace the forelegs by placing one under each bun and sitting on them. [It keeps getting weirder, more abstract, more disconnected temporally, so the rest is all I can say about it.]
Now we're in the house and horrfied to find that the elephant is T. Shirtless, he demonstrates that the elephant's forelegs are trying to pop out of his shoulder. A bulging motion protrudes from the upper arm. [In fear and loathing I abandon the dream. Thus "T." was really the Dream Usher ending the dream as usual.]
[Over the next few hours with mask on before waking I was in a more or less continuous state of partial lucidity or else awake in the Projection Room, feeling vibrations especially in arms, noticing the onset and/or vestiges of paralysis, seeing full-screen images of fine purple and green lines, going in and out of sleep, almost but not quite remembering to move, not getting up to pee or to get a drink. A very good experience and the whole night was pretty much that way. If I'd gotten up at 3:00 for meditation and maybe muggons, I'm sure the dream would have been totally lucid.]
[Added note: notice the increased credit being given to muggons, but according to the dream I am doing something very wrong, forgetting to feed the lucidity (the elephant) and tying it down so it has no flexibility. In my opinion now, I was ending my lucidity streak via muggons, losing my momentum, and this dream was a warning to get back on track. --ed.]
12:55-1:40 pm
[Lying down, mask, drum/waterfall sounds. Started with breaths 30-40-50.]
1:40 pm
[Two interesting experiences. 1) Noticed that I'd failed to notice an image of a pair of young girls, small (far away) on the right. Moved attention back and] they're still there. I follow them, precede them, and they're walking along the top of a ridge or dike with feathery foliage close to me and the ridge much farther away. The scene becomes completely 3D and fills the screen and I lose awareness. JERK my dream body's right leg jerked up and to the left and its left leg jerked down and to the right--whole body twisted--while physical body barely moved, if at all. 2) Had lost awareness when a bug/itch was sensed on the back of my right hand. I see the bug--tiny--walking on the back of my hand and raise it to smack the bug. Upon smacking my hand I realized I'd watched all this through my closed eyelids and dark mask. Hitting my hand woke me up with a JERK. Note: found that by turning the drum sounds down a lot and the water sounds down a little the drum was not distracting but still had the desired effect.]
6:00 pm
[Breathwalking.]
9:10 pm
[To bed. When I become lucid, I will look at my hands, rub my hands, shake my hands, clap my hands. I will repeat my affirmation, "I love this place." I will spin and teleport to the Urumara and I will see it and experience the Urumara from all sides.]
[Muggons sachet in mask then in pillowcase after preliminary sleep.]
[WILD session will precede sleep. I really WANT to remain conscious. Upon awakening I will remain motionless and with eyes closed. I will know I'm waking before I awake so I can stay still. I will remember my dream and I will picture it and go back to it, and I will know I'm dreaming. I will remain calm and I will carry out my Intent Agenda to see my hands.]
2017-02-18 12:30 am
[Noticed when I got up to pee that I could generate full-sized, full-color 3D images, but wanted to get this dream down so it better be good. Hard to remember.]
First Kay, then Karen--or vice versa, can't remember which--has made a blatant move to go out of her way to reject me in a publicly humiliating way. Kay did it at Campbell Hot Springs so I suggested that she stay at Campbells and experience half the shit I went through there because it might help her attitude.
Karen also pulled her crap at the Commune in the meeting room full of people at their various activities. I catch her tracing something in my handwriting which she went to the trouble of photographing, then printed out, and now she's laboriously tracing over my exact handwriting to demonstrate what I said.
I in turn try to photgraph her efforts but when I push the button down on the camera, set it down and walk away, it uses up half a roll of film to take one picture (I assume) which is OK, I was wanting only one picture, but now the picture will be too big to print and look how much money I spent to take one lousy picture.
What I was trying to photograph was a RED sticker on the far right side of a bulletin board. The smallest of four red bumper stickers and the most objectionable of them [red = emotion].
3:22-3:35 am
[Meditation.]
3:35 am
[Crackers and prunes.]
4:30 am
[To bed, dream bed, mask, WILD, sleep on side because not sleepy. Muggons in pillow sachet. Remember to remain aware, say affirmation, see/rub hands, clap, shake, twirl, teleport to Urumara.]
The house is being remodeled as a communal house for IA and others [Cwahacoy and the other dream bodies] to move into with us. It is bright and spacious with big rooms.
I strike up a conversation with IA and she tells me the style of the remodeling is to be very plain, not fancy. I agree with her in no uncertain terms. I go on about the advantages of an unadorned style, using specific exact wording [which I now don't recall] to emphasize the exact particular reasons why a no-frills house is literally more elegant and wonderful and desirable than a fancy one.
[Muggons is the frill. It's going to take a back seat. It is a distraction and became relied upon vs personal effort. YouTube has to go too. Back to journaling and mapping the Unworld.]
3:23 pm
[WILD practice, pillow on table, sitting in chair, shaman drumbeat/waterfall sounds, added word "dream" about once per five minutes (new track added). Will expand hypnagogia into screenshot and straight from there. Upon becoming lucid I will look at hands, look at ground and say, "I love this place," then clap hands, rub hands, shake hands, then whirl/teleport to the Urumara and investigate it and experience it from all sides.]
[Couldn't relax, too many people in the room.]
4:25-4:50 pm
[Meditation. Mostly dozing.]
[AWK] Words on WHITE BACKGROUND, big black bold type.
[AWK] Scrolling through lucid dream techniques, just choose one.
5:00 pm
[Breathwalking.]
6:00 pm
[To bed for the night will WILD, DILD, MILD, whatever. This is it tonight. I will retain awareness continuously.]
6:15 pm
[To bed.]
9:05 pm
[Moved to end session. Didn't move for three hours, see WILDing journal, good session.]
9:30 pm
[To sleep.]
2017-02-19
AZ house. I feel like I'm sneaking in to deliver a cup of tea, yet I apparently have permission.
Then I'm by the street, sunny. AZ drives up in a convertible, little Miss Hot Shot attorney, and we exchange words. I am not being friendly. [She looks same as when she was my 16-year-old girlfriend. Forgot details of conversation.]
***
[Also about AZ hours later, but forgot the plot.]
3:30-3:48 pm
[Meditation while watching/listening to 'pineal wave' youtube.]
7:40 pm
[To bed to ride the WILDING dragon. Nothing else matters. Everything else is fluff.]
11:25 pm
[Back to bed.]
2017-02-20 3:00 am
[Had a LUCID MOMENT earlier, but no idea what it was about. Also last night during WILD session, I had a lucid Little Dream but woke at the same time as becoming lucid. No meditation. Back to bed now on back with mask to WILD.]
[Muggons aroma only before going back to bed, no muggons yesterday.]
Cwahacoy/SC [ident = Alice from CHS] HANDS me a CASSETTE TAPE to listen to and the case is half broken off. This is such a precious gift from such a sweet lady, how can I show my appreciation? I ask her if she wants one of my tapes and she says OK.
I search through my old tapes, first the top tray and then the bottom tray, for a TAPE THAT'S WORTHY OF HER FRIENDSHIP. Like that highly coveted Jon-Luc Ponty tape on the bottom tray that I haven't listened to in years [color dusty rose = Limberluck]. Trouble is, anything good enough for my friend is also worth keeping. But I decide she's worth it, and give her the tape [typical of Limberluck to share what he has; also this is merging of 6ness with 8ness.]
[I wake up in bed, move very little, remember to close mouth and wait for saliva to flow so no drink of water is needed and never mind getting up to pee. Focus on the Nowhere and back to dream.]
Out in the yard, sunny daytime, big wood two-story AQUA house [Cwahacoy's color]. Party going on, casual, neighbors and stuff. I put a TAPE in a BOOMBOX.
The ID of a TWO-TONE BROWN DOG IS IN QUESTION. I LOOK MORE CLOSELY and see it's not a dog I know, but a larger dog like a pitbull-boxer mix or something.
A smaller dog is an object of concern [forget details] and a neighbor who's a guest at the party has put up a two-foot tall wire FENCE all over my yard, which I will now have to step over to GO FROM ONE PART OF THE YARD TO THE OTHER, the rest of my life. I decide I can deal with it and the fence is not that high [the Urumara.] I go onto the front porch and I see that my meddlesome neighbor has installed LOCKS on all my doors too, which irks me at first, but I SEE I'M NOT LOCKED OUT, so I just go inside.
Another BOOMBOX inside is TUNED to a different station than the one outside, so I run the dial over all the way to the LEFT [almost lucid] and start SLOWLY CREEPING IT TO THE RIGHT and soon get both boomboxes to play the same station [they merge].
I go into the big empty garage [Projection Room] and Smudgely is there. What a treat to see my little friend, she's a sight for sore eyes [a two-tone little brown dog, a close friend who is a symbol of pointing out lucidity since she came to me in a Big Dream that I had the day she died.]
[This dream was all about the Urumara: locks, fences, etc. and not only full of dreamsigns and PLOs but even Smudgely herself, my guide in charge of dreamsigns.]
5:30 am
[Had to get out of bed when I was in vibrations--arms as usual--from waking up out of a LUCID dream and wanted to go back into it but decided to get up and write it down instead.]
"The Notary Customer from Hell"
At the POSTAL CENTER, the lobby [Green Room] is a big open space, color very light gray and dimly lit except back behind the counter where I am. There's only one customer, a young yuppie in nice clothes like an attorney. He is about six feet tall with dark hair and a roundish face.
The customer pays me in advance for WITNESSING SOMETHING and I get my JOURNAL out, then it turns out that what he expects me to notarize is a BLANK PIECE OF PAPER in a LIME GREEN pad of paper [the Nowhere: the customer is trying to introduce himself as the Dream Usher]. The pad is a stack of paper about one inch thick glued together at the top edge. He flips through the top few sheets to show me that other notaries have stamped his blank pages and he fully expects me to do the same. I BECOME IRATE [as I always do when I meet the Dream Usher] and demand that he produce a proper document for me to notarize, but he insists that I do what he says.
I tell him I am going to write down exactly what happened in my JOURNAL for my own protection and he leaves for his own safety. Meanwhile, customers have come in and stacked up behind him, and now I'm not only upset about the notarization gone wrong, but also UNDER PRESSURE [the Urumara] at the same time from legit customers.
Mr. Murray [puts in a short cameo appearance as SC and] sternly but not unkindly tells me to STAY FOCUSED ON THE TASK AT HAND. A male customer [SC] sends me SYMPATHETIC VIBES.
My brother shows up and tries to be helpful since I am now very far behind with customers piling up and everybody has big stuff to package and ship. Bro jumps right in there weighing packages and displays his lack of training by reading #6 as "number six" instead of "six pounds" then corrects himself. I inform one customer that it will cost ten--no fifteen--no twenty dollars just to make a box for the large item she wants to ship, which appears to be an ELECTRIC PIANO KEYBOARD in a case.
A conversation ensues between us two as I try to decide whether a long object will have to be packed in an oversized box, thus charged at a higher rate. I am carefully measuring the box on the scale, having explained to the customer that it has to be put inside a larger box with 2 inches of foam peanuts all the way around it, calling out EXACT MEASUREMENTS "11 inches" etc. for bro to write down. Then I realize the package will weigh so much--it's already 47 pounds--that the oversize restriction doesn't even enter into it.
[I wake up in vibrations--mostly arms--move a little, close mouth to generate saliva without panicky swallowing, tell the urge to pee to go away, and focus on Blaffinveigle and observing the Nowhere until a new dream forms. It worked!]
I'm back at the POSTAL CENTER and I KNOW I'M DREAMING. I'm not satisfied with my level of lucidity and a little upset about the complete lack of euphoria, but I decide to let go of the disappointment and dig into the dream, give it my all and see where it goes.
[I did not remember any of my oft-repeated injunctions to self such as look at hands, repeat affirmation, but] I do RECALL THAT I SHOULD DO SOMETHING PHYSICAL to catalyze the state. I realize that the evil notary customer from the previous dream is hibernating in some sort of high tech fluid INCUBATION DEVICE inside the BLACK CASE I have right here in front of me [earlier thought to be an electric piano] so I figure now's my chance to give that creep what he deserves [the bad guy is still the Dream Usher and now has the ID of the Green Ripper].
I aggressively rip the black case out of its carton and open it. Sure enough, the bad guy is in there, in the form of a pair of foot-long legs in the black slacks, plugged into a cubic black box replacing head and torso, with that plugged into the other half of the long box which is some sort of fluid circulating apparatus like an artificial kidney but for his black soul to flow through in order to reinvigorate itself.
I yank the bad guy out of his sockets and use his cubic head/torso to smash open the fluid circulation unit, happy that I am able to wreak vengeance on the man who ruined my previous dream [still unaware he is the Dream Usher trying to help me].
The apparatus splits open under my assault and I announce that I have found "the sink". I tip the large sheet metal sink up and spill the fluid contents out, losing the dream thread as I do so [and waking up in Vibes. Didn't have time to try going back to sleep. Note the fear that the Dream Usher still incites. I always want to rip him to shreds for some reason. This dream never developed past Level One lucidity. I knew I was dreaming but did not remember who I am, or displace the dream plot with an ascent to anything more real/realistic.]
2:00 pm
[WILD session, dream bed, mask, waterfall/white noise with drum and "dream" suggestion about once per five minutes.]
[Upon awakening within the dream (becoming lucid) I will stop what I'm doing, look at hands, rub hands, clap hands, shake hands, say my affirmation "I love this place," whirl to teleport to the Urumara which I will view and experience from all sides.]
3:00 pm
[Have easily and readily fallen asleep over and over from the first minute of practice today, but keep being woken up, maybe by the word "dream" and maybe by swallowing which seems to wake me up.]
3:07-3:30 pm
[Turning off the word "dream" and back under the mask.]
6:00 pm
[Breathwalking.]
8:15 pm
[To bed. When I become lucid, I will look at my hands, clap my hands, rub my hands, shake my hands, look at the ground, and repeat my affirmation, "I love this place." Then I will whirl into the vicinity of the Urumara and I will see and experience it from all sides.]