2017-08-13 12:01 midnight
[To bed after being in front of the computer all day up to bedtime.]
[Finally bothering to record last night's unworlding, what an Idiossitard. Last night I was apparently not in the mood to get lucid, but did anyway, and then didn't want to lose ten minutes of sleep getting up to write it down. Just thought it interesting that 1) I was barely into my sleep cycle again; this lucidity did not occur after four to six hours of sleep. 2) I have not been meditating much or recording dreams much. 3) I've been at the computer all day till bedtime. And got lucid anyway. What I have been doing is occasionally visualizing getting on the ground and crawling through curtain after curtain upon becoming lucid, symbolically incubating another hoped-for conscious experience of the Urumara.]
[The experience was enjoyable of course, but on waking from it, I was very receptive to the Voice of Idiossification informing me of various reasons to not write it down. Settled on trying to Chain back in, but should have used FILD as it acts like an anchor or has in the past, to keep the Attention from drifting away.]
I'm walking by flipping both feet up behind me and my feet actually never touch the ground. This seems vaguely ODD in a way, but I dismiss this thought and carry on. I cycle through some scene or exercise two or three times or more [content forgotten] and then it strikes me that I am dreaming, and once again that DISTINCTIVE FEELING that I'm slowly becoming FAMILIAR with--the feeling of incredulity and awe when realizing that my perfectly ordinary existence and experience at that very moment is in fact a dream! An imaginary, ephemeral, symbolic experience with no repercussions. The incredulity is due to the fact that I had, up to a moment ago, routinely assumed that my experience was ordinary and real.
For a second I start to pull the usual indulgent pattern, I start to pick up the pace on swimming through the air by kicking up my feet and a couple times I do the "I'm dreaming! I'm dreaming!" bit. Then as visualized during waking moments, I remember to settle down to my knees instead of flying around in an ecstatic spurt of wasted energy.
I'm on a cobblestone sidewalk at night in the City on a hill on the left side of the street, in other words, the brick building is to my LEFT and the street is to my RIGHT. I see this and experience it at the same time [dual consciousness, or is this what they're calling 360 degree 'vision'?] From the point of view of myself as observer, the sidewalk that my participant self is on runs from left to right, but when my knees touch down, I--the observer--merge with first person point of view, with the me on the sidewalk, and now the perspective is what's straight in front of me, not what is to the LEFT or RIGHT of me from an outside observer position. [In contrast, my last lucid dream was in the SAME PLACE, but any observer point of view would have registered the sidewalk I was on as extending straight in front of both him and me. So in last night's dream, dream-character me and observer me had 90 degrees perspective with respect to each other, but the time before that--in the same place--we had zero phase difference in regards to each other.]
Once on my knees, I obediently-to-Intent-Agenda pretend there's a curtain in front of me and I reach out with both hands and spread the curtain apart. Simultaneoulsy, my vision clears and I see the city laid out in front of me, soft, dark, house lights, old like the cobblestones I'm kneeling on. But the only thing my stupid conscious mind notices is that no actual curtain materialized, so I'm disappointed and I decide I'm not really dreaming. I stand up and walk away. I get to a turnstile and go through it knowing it's a one-way device and I'm going through it the wrong way [the Urumara, i.e. the next curtain... I'm still checking off agenda items while unaware of doing so]. Going through the turnstile backwards [as per Intent Agenda re: traversing the Urumara in both directions] causes it to make a clicking, ratcheting sound. I am afraid this sound might bother somebody [and wake up].
[The Idiossifier was busy last night. Sometime today, when I wrote the word "tiger" for no particular reason--when I could have chosen any other living thing--I remembered] an intense encounter with many tigers [last night.] I'm there (somewhere) with SC, fascinated by a close encounter with about ten tigers at various proximities. I'm fascinated, then scared, then curious when one of the tigers has ODD colors such as white stripes instead of black.
[Time to change my Intent Agenda. I again made it to my knees and opened the curtain--and got a turnstile as the representation of the next curtain I'd planned to find there, and went through that, not appreciating how closely I was adhering to my agenda, even having grave doubts that I was really dreaming. The old habit of flying off all my energy seems to be getting under control. I'm sure the crawling (instead of flying) theme will continue unbidden--it's not like I know how to remove an agenda item from Intent--but I need a new strategy that is more likely to generate instant success. Continuing the theme of not flying or screaming in ecstasy, I now plan to look around and just start walking, interact with everyone I see, touch everything I pass, and ask directions to the Library where I plan to seek out the Bob Neal section.]
[Re-reading this now. I will look for a sign to the Library, ask a stranger where the Library is, look for a likely Library building, go through the first door I find, and look for a librarian.]
[It wasn't till I wrote this down that any of it made any impact on me at all. Till I recorded it, I did not see the patterns, the familiarity, nothing. Due to listening to the Idiossifier, I thought it was the worst lucid dream I ever had. Not so! It was awesome!]